Maybe I should make my world maps like this. It would prevent distortion and would be an interesting change of pace from the standard world map.

I guess this can be taken as a slight apology for my Pomni cactus vent drawing. My sona Dusk (aka me) explaining.

In other words I'm a sick fuck, literally and figuratively. But I'm gonna try to contain my sick fuckness.

Digital Circus memes bc I'm bored. Emetophobia warning on the 3rd pic. Fun fact, the 3rd pic is actually based on a true story, the story of September 30th, 2023 in my house.

Lemme tell you the story, I forgot to drink or eat anything all day, and I had an intense argument about Megaman Zero. It gave me a pretty bad headache from the stress and when I went to take medicine, I discovered I couldn't keep anything down. Not even water or a damn Ritz cracker. I was basically stuck in my room and my poor cat Sorcha witnessed me re-enact the funeral scene from Jane Austen's Mafia (slight exaggeration, it was less IRL but it certainly felt like that scene). All I wanted was to sleep it off but I couldn't sleep from the headache. Eventually it went away but that whole experience sucked. I learned a lesson, don't forget that food exists and take a break if things are stressing you out bc you might end up locked in your room recreating the scene where Pomni gets back from the tour of the digital circus.

Warning, kind of a vent post.

Honestly idk what else to say other than I relate to Pomni. As an enby and a huge metaphysics/religion nerd, I've had many an identity crisis/existential crisis and feeling like I don't belong in this mortal body. I have had mental breaks similar to what we see with Pomni and the moment that she realizes there is no escape had put a sense of fear that I can only describe as existential dread mixed with feeling really bad for a character. I just feel bad for her and I get the feeling that she is on the way to abstraction (maybe in the finale idk).

So I watched The Amazing Digital Circus and I really like it. I relate to Pomni a lot. Make of that what you will. Anyway I wanted to talk about one scene and the character implications it has. WARNING: this contains discussions and imagery of gore, 👁️ trauma, self-harm and the psychological implications of that.

Also spoilers for TADC.

Near the beginning, Pomni realizes that she can't take a headset off. Due to some unnoticed sarcasm from Jax, Pomni ends up pulling her 👁️ out. Yes this is canon. My thoughts are that this indicates even early on, Pomni was desperate to get out of the digital world no matter how much pain the process caused for her. And honestly I can't blame her for that. I think she was already unstable before the events of TADC, so take that how you will. PSA, never harm yourself for any reason that isn't survival. If you don't believe me that what I'm talking about happened in canon or just don't remember for some reason, here's the proof.

Also the look of realization speaks volumes to how Pomni is feeling in this moment, realizing that won't work and she is stuck in this place. This scene is a strange mix of horrifying, darkly comical and depressing when you really think about it.

I'm not putting TADC tags here bc of that side of the fandom.

This is a basic synopsis of one of my stories, Martyres Artificialis. Basically a combination of Megaman (specifically MMZ) and the SCP Foundation. Anomalous things happen all over the planet and big companies develop robots to try to solve the problems. Problem is, they made the robots too humanlike and they started getting affected by the anomalies. There will be anomalies of all kinds that I could fit in this universe and have it make sense. Extradimensional beings, sentient flesh that spreads like a fungus, plants that infect other life to kill anything anthropomorphic, a beast that brainwashes anything sapient into worshipping it, etc. Anthroids are in serious trouble because humans played god. Anthroids are equipped as mobile task force or field researchers most of the time. The title comes from artificial martyrs or (Latin) martyres artificialis, I like putting religious parallels in my stories. I think it works since companies are sending anthroids who believe the task to be an honor to their deaths or far worse. I'll update more (hopefully). The story follows one anthroid Zenris, he believes what the company says in the first arc, but as he gains experience he starts seeing holes in their logic and the way the company doesn't care about the way they treat anthroids, specifically their staff. He starts going against the company's orders to (in his mind) more effectively contain anomalies and protect humanity. The experiences of anomalies and trauma, plus discovering that his employers have been using his entire species as lab rats/expendable staff sorta drives him to madness, paranoia and overanalysis.

Some things I want to say about one of my stories/projects Code of Arcana. First, I'm in the progress of changing the organic features of Arcana modded robots to be more original. Ex, their wings are more like pterosaurs, wandering albatross, and in lore Codewatchers and archons. Their tails have a metal blade connected via organic tissue and their hunt screen design is different now (the last one is the same for venators). Got this advice from one of my friends after I realized the arcane designs of Mica and Caliber were too similar to a certain series I grew disillusioned with.

I totally headcanon MMZ Zero being voiced by Lucas Gilbertson. I think it fits and I don't see an in universe reason as to why his voice should change. Btw Lucas' VA has improved a lot since the X series, and I know that because of Terminalmontage. I have this recurring joke in my head involving Zero going somewhere in the base and seeing something like everyone in the base playing randomized card games with randomized rules, and his response is confused silence and then "what on earth is going on in here on this day?" I thought that was funny.

I'm currently revising Entropy (my cosmic horror/fantasy/psychological horror comic), expanding the lore and worldbuilding of Code of Arcana (my robot matrix/psychological/religious horror story) and I might write something about some of my other stories. If you couldn't tell, I'm a horror fan.

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRE MEGAMAN ZERO SERIES. DO NOT CONTINUE READING UNLESS YOU HAVE PLAYED OR WATCHED THEM.

So I binge watched gameplay of the Megaman Zero series and... I can confirm Zero is my favorite character, and I can confirm I'm gonna have a hopefully quick but rough time getting over the ending of MMZ 4. Hopefully he made it to cyberspace and has enough willpower to become like X or Phantom. That's my headcanon and you can't take it from me. Did I mention I kin Zero aka identify with him? Yeah. I shall now share a prayer/memorial in my mom's side of the family's Spanish.

Él todavía vive en mi memoria. Seguiré dibujándolo, mi apego a él trasciende la vida y la muerte. Godspeed Zero, eras y sigues siendo una verdadera leyenda. Translated: He lives on in my memory. I will continue to draw him, my attachment to him transcends life and death. Godspeed Zero, you were and still are a true legend.

TLDR, I know Zero is canonically dead, but I will still draw him out of my personal attachment to him. If I can accept that he's long gone by the time of the legends era, I can accept this. It's gonna be a painful messy road to acceptance, but really all I have to do is process my emotions (mainly via art because that's how I express myself) and then I can look at him and not have an urge to slam my head into a wall.